Where You Can Find Me Online

I am rarely blogging these days. But I am still creating contact and connecting with readers and would love to stay in touch.

During Covid, I made the switch to Substack. Now, the best way to stay in touch is via email or one of my two Substack newsletters. You can find my email here:

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Do Good Better includes links to my essays, speaking engagements, podcasts, personal updates, as well as new essays for that community.

Stories from the Horn is a bi-weekly newsletter which includes links (and sometimes commentary) on the most important or interesting news and articles from and about the Horn of Africa. It will also occasionally include some personal updates.

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By |June 10th, 2021|Categories: Uncategorized|0 Comments

Mary, Emptied

My friend Jess talked recently about the holiness of feeling empty. I had read an article for grad school about breastfeeding as an entrance into theology, breastfeeding as spiritual practice. We do not talk about this enough in our faith teachings or sermons. Have you ever heard a Christmas sermon about the pain, blood, and visceral reality of Jesus being born? Have you heard a public meditation on what it might have been like, or meant, for Mary to lift this tender newborn to her breast to feed him? How much do we miss when we neglect these very female aspects of our spirituality and faith stories?

I thought about my friend’s words of emptiness and thought about Mary.

How did Mary feel after Jesus was born?

I don’t mean in her emotions, we know she paid attention to all the events around Jesus’ birth and early years and pondered them in her heart.
I mean how did she feel in her physical body? How would this pregnancy compare to future pregnancies? After Jesus was born did she feel strangely emptied, her womb no longer the dwelling place of the divine? Her body no longer a shelter for the sacred?
(If you’d like to hear me read this out loud, check out my IGTV on Instagram)
Mary, Emptied
Mary
breathed into
and full
Mary,
belly growing
breasts filling
ankles swelling
bladder squishing
Mary
kicked from inside by tiny feet
plagued by strange cravings
Mary
hungry, always so hungry
back aching and no comfortable way to sleep
Mary
the fire, the pressure, the need, the terror, the thrill, the release
The Word became flesh and
Mary
emptied.
What did this feel like?
Was there a hole where the holy had been?
Was there an ache to be filled with God again?
Was there a relief to release this baby into the world,
your body no longer the sole container of eternal justice and hope?
Was there grief because you could no longer protect this gift with the power of your own body, flesh, blood, bone, uterus?
Mary
arms filled with love
belly poured out,
When did you next feel so filled?
Or did you walk the dusty roads of Palestine
ever aware you were now emptied of the Divine?
By |December 20th, 2020|Categories: Uncategorized|Tags: , |1 Comment

Leaving Demons Behind

Leaving the Little Demons Behind. An essay about exploring history and legend in Somaliland. Click to read the full essay.

…5,000-year old paintings proliferate inside caves thirty-four miles outside Hargeisa, Somaliland, in an area called Las Geel. Some paintings are possibly as old as 7,000 years. Who painted them and why is unknown. Exactly what they represent is unknown. Who will protect them is also unknown.

Fear of jinn, or mischievous little demons, protected these paintings for centuries as people feared becoming cursed or possessed. Some people said the paintings were drawn with human blood. Goat herders avoided the caves unless sudden thunderstorms drove them inside for protection.

I grew up believing fear was a sin. I was also afraid of everything, which left me in a constant state of guilt. God told Joshua, “Do not be afraid.” Almost every time an angel spoke with a human, the angel first said, “Do not be afraid.” What was I supposed to do with my fear of heights, fear of adults, fear of talking to a stranger on the telephone, fear of a bad grade? My fears were trivial, not like the fears Somali herders felt about jinn, but they were still damning.

As an adult, a longing to be free from fear pushed me toward scary things and I moved to Somaliland in 2003. This felt like one way my faith could work itself out in action and with trembling. What I didn’t yet understand is that facing fear gives faith the opportunity to actually be faith…

Leaving the Little Demons Behind. An essay about exploring history and legend in Somaliland. Click to read the full essay.

By |December 7th, 2020|Categories: Uncategorized|0 Comments

One year of Stronger than Death: Reviews Matter

Reviews are really important. I didn’t quite understand that before. But reviews and star rankings on Amazon, Goodreads, Indie bookseller pages…they matter in how the sites rank and place books. They help get eyes on books and help readers decide whether or not to invest time and money into a story.

So please, if you haven’t already, consider leaving a review at one of these places. And while you are there, leave a review for other books you’ve read. They don’t have to be five-star reviews either. I won’t feel bad if you give it your real, honest opinion. Also doesn’t have to be long. I’m a fan of leaving 1-2 sentence reviews. Just don’t be a jerk.

There used to be a notice on Stronger than Death’s Amazon page that the book had “issues” reported. This is because when it was first published, the wrong book had been loaded into the Kindle content. Meaning, everyone who pre-ordered or purchased the Kindle book for the first few days found a different book inside (a great book, but not the one they wanted).

This issue was fixed. A LOOOOOOONNNNNNGGGG time ago. Like the first week. But still, that stupid flag remained and I hated it. I think it has been finally removed, but once in a while it does show up again.

Leaving a good review can help conquer reader doubts about the book after they see that flag.

Here are some, from short to long:

“Could not put this book down. Very interesting true story of what it means to be selfless in a selfish world.” Mac girl

“I think everyone should know what it looks like to really love your neighbor as yourself, which is what Annalena did and in the greatest humility.” Deb Brunsberg

This is a hard, but inspiring read. It both horrifies and uplifts. The author did a fabulous job researching and compiling a well-written book on the life of a woman I had never heard of, but will never forget. This is a woman every bit as heroic as Mother Theresa but who insisted in living a life of quiet service to those most in need, without the recognition and accolades she so deserved. This would be a fabulous book for book clubs or for anyone wanting to know more about the deprivations and hardships in countries such as Somaliland. Kudos to the author for both bringing this story to light and for having the courage to live in such a hostile land herself. I feel like my review really doesn’t do this book justice, but it should be required reading to help our children understand some of the difficulties that region faces, to help adults understand the politics and turmoil of that area, to raise awareness in politicians, and to inspire each of us to live a more selfless life.” WiWise

“Interwoven throughout this biography is historical and cultural facts about the people that call the Horn of Africa home, but it is also a memoir of sorts as Rachel shares how she and her family were affected by Annalena’s murder. On top of all this, there is some journalist reporting, as Rachel shares her own thoughts and questions regarding some of the decisions that Annalena made. I believe that if you are interested in the Horn of Africa, humanitarian aid work, female genital mutilation, or Muslim/Christian relationships than you should read this book.” MD Mauer

“If you want to be challenged, if you want to love more, if you want to read how love changes lives, read this book. Annalena wouldn’t want to be made into a celebrity. She fought that her whole life. And she definitely wouldn’t want to be made into a saint. But she shows us how to live as a human fully — loving with all we have and loving every second of our days and nights.” Jane Hinrichs

“This book is deeply involving, and at times totally stark and grim, but it gives a vivid and authentic picture of a woman who was completely dedicated to the concept of service in love. Annalena perceived her call to serve the poor totally, with utter involvement and boundless determination. Although she was not a doctor, she was a magnificent organizer and meticulous record keeper, and turned out to be uniquely qualified to institute a “DOTS” (Directly Observed Therapy Short-Course) tuberculosis program among Somali nomads. It was, however, her personal charisma that provided the necessary motivation which convinced the patients to commit to and continue with the course of treatment that led to the extraordinary cure rates the program accomplished. The medical success story, though, was continually interrupted by war and acts of atrocity, and was eventually reversed when the scourge of TB was compounded by the HIV/AIDS invasion from other nations following the disruption of the Somali social structure and the increased political tension after the American reaction to the 9/11 attacks and the rise of ever more militant Islam. Although Annalena never proselytized, and indeed at one point had FGM performed on her own adopted Somali daughters in order to not challenge the prevailing beliefs and customs, she remained Christian in outlook and to some extent in observance. This inevitably led to the eventual resentment of her presence and success which caused her death in October of 2003.

Author Rachel Pieh Jones does a magnificent job of maintaining balance and integrity in her narrative. She is honest about the failings both of those who attempt to bring aid to the war-torn areas of the world, as well as the gory and corrupt local conditions which often stymie those efforts. Annalena was, of course, totally unique in her refusal to be limited by the bureaucracy of many self-serving groups, both religious and otherwise. She had a small coterie of backers in Italy whom she knew personally, and was to some extent supported by the WHO, but refused to let her efforts be subsumed and diluted by fund raising endeavors. The way she circumvented much of the bribery and graft that was considered obligatory at the time is a truly fascinating sideline. Though this book is very painful at times, it is also a deeply moving, rewarding and inspirational story.” Trudie Barreras

Buy the book!

Plough: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

Indiebound: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

Barnes and Noble: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

Amazon: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

One year of Stronger than Death: Unforgettable Conversations from Book Tour

One.

In Washington D.C., I was preparing for my first ever book tour event. I felt nervous, out of place, uncertain of what to expect, and a little bit like a fraud – who would actually come out to hear me talk?! And then…friends, strangers, and even a family member showed up. Friends from my church in Minnesota, a young woman who had spent her entire life in Djibouti and whose mother helped me translate throughout my second pregnancy, David Brown journalist with the Washington Post, and my brother-in-law who came bearing gifts of snacks, a plant, and skull socks (don’t ask, I’m not sure!). At the second event, the former ambassador to Djibouti came and we took a selfie together. She lived in Djibouti before I had even heard it existed, but we know and love some of the same people.

Two.

In Colorado Springs I got to meet Dimity McDowell of Another Mother Runner. I totally had my own little fan girl moment when she came to my book event! I wanted her to sign my book, what a treat. Also Amy Young, author of so many wonderful books and whom I had not yet met in person. Internet people are real people, internet friends are real friends, go figure!

Three.

In Chicago worlds collided as I met for the first time the editor of some of my very earliest published work, in EthnoTraveler, and friends came from Indonesia, many friends from Djibouti showed up, and more internet people turned real.

Four.

In Minneapolis. Ah, Minneapolis. Afro Deli hosted the most wonderful book launch party ever. We packed out the place. I had hoped a few loyal friends and family would come and almost 100 people turned out. Chef Musa and Kahin were incredibly generous and joyful and it was such an honor and privilege to be welcomed into that space, for this book.

White Minnesotans told me at many events, how much they appreciated this book for how it opened up the world of their Somali coworkers, neighbors, and friends in a new way. They said it helped them think of conversational questions and topics, and that they hoped it could be a bridge to deeper relationships. Somali Minnesotans told me the exact same thing, in reverse.

At one event, two Somali Americans sat in the back, and we enjoyed a question and answer period so much that afterwards, they took my phone number, then called that night and said, “We have to keep talking!” I was leaving the country in two days so we had a quick breakfast in the morning and have stayed in touch. What I loved about our conversations is that we understand so much about each other – the American and the Somali parts – and barely needed extra explanations.

I was invited to speak to a class at St. Olaf University in southern Minnesota. When we lived in Somaliland, my kids played with a neighbor girl. When we fled, my daughter cried, specifically about not seeing this girl ever again. In 2018, this girl turned up at St. Olaf University in Minnesota as an exchange student. I invited her to come to my event and we had the most incredible conversation, as both of us heard stories from the other that we had never heard before about the aftermath of Annalena’s murder and our sudden departure. She said something I will never forget, and I loosely quote it, “We used to think foreigners were dangerous and shouldn’t live in our town. But because of Annalena, even though she was a white Christian, we now are open to letting other foreigners, even Christians, Americans, white people, anyone, live among us, because we have seen her love.” What a testimony to the power of how Annalena’s practical service has opened the way for ongoing partnerships and relationships.

At my last in-person book event, a Somali man arrived early and we started chatting. He said he grew up in Wajir, Kenya, where Annalena had initially worked. He knew her, and Maria Teresa, and others quite well. He remembered the Wagalla Massacre, after which he had fled the region and eventually the continent, to settle in Minnesota. Then he said, “You know how Annalena smuggled the list of names of the dead out of Wajir during the massacre? The person who carried those names out, that was me.” I almost fell over. He started to tell the story of getting that piece of paper that would expose the government’s crimes, from the town to the capital.

Through all these conversations, one thing stood out. I had the immense privilege of writing this story. But writing it wasn’t about earning Annalena glory (she would turn over in her grave) and certainly not for earning me glory.

It was for these stories, for honoring these memories, for forging these new connections, for moving into dialogue and conversation and relationship.

 


Plough: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

Indiebound: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

Barnes and Noble: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

Amazon: Stronger than Death: How Annalena Tonelli Defied Terror and Tuberculosis in the Horn of Africa

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